


Decisions, Decisions

by inheritanceofgeek



Series: Parenthood does wonders for you, Darling [4]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Baby Names, F/M, Family Fluff, Fluff, Kid Fic, Minor Spoilers for Episode 64, Parenthood, Post Vecna
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-23
Updated: 2017-08-23
Packaged: 2018-12-19 00:42:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11886309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inheritanceofgeek/pseuds/inheritanceofgeek
Summary: Now that their children have finally arrived, it's time to decide on some names. If only it could be that easy...





	Decisions, Decisions

“You know, we’re going to have to decide on names eventually.” Sighed Percy, pulling Vex closer towards him as they watched their two boys sleep peacefully. “We can't keep on calling them 'This’ and ‘That’, we’ll mess them up before they've even had a chance to talk back.”

“I know, but if we keep calling them that then Grog will keep on thinking he’s the one who has to do the nappies as ‘Grand Poobah de boink of all this and that’. Plus he’s got the better constitution when it comes to poop.”

“Yes, I didn't think we’d be able to get as much out of that as we have.” Mused Percy, suppressing a yawn “but you know you’ll have to do them eventually, you can't keep passing it off.”

“Hey, I did all the hard work! For fourteen months and then ten hours in labour, _and_ I have to do all the midnight feedings! I’ve not had more than 3 hours straight sleep since they arrived. _You_ can deal with the shit.” She retorted, shoving him slightly

Percy raised his hands in submission “Alright, alright I’ll deal with them. But you're the one who said you wanted to do all of this without any paid help.”

“Grog’s _family_ , that doesn’t count.” she sniffed, holding her head high. She still felt a little guilty though, she had intended to be a ‘hands-on’ type of parent, as different to her father as possible, but the promise of someone else handling the literal dirty work was appealing. Percy was right on one thing though, they did need to give them names, but it was just so hard to decide! There was so much to take into consideration, considering their role as the new line of De Rolos...

“We could pick one each and that’d solve it.” Suggested Percy, looking at them fondly as This wiggled in his sleep, tiny fist waving in the air. The phrase ‘slept like a baby’ seemed rather apt at this point, although he’d also seen them screaming so loudly that they nearly had the whole castle banging on their door to ask them to do something about it. Cassandra was only sated in her rage by how cute they looked when they weren’t crying. Like right now, _Pelor_ how could there be so much adorable in just one crib? It didn’t seem feasible and yet here they were! Then This’ hand reached a little too far over, and almost hit his brother. That, without opening his eyes, moved his equally tiny fist and thwacked This on the head. This’ face scrunched up as though he were about to cry but then seemed to think better of it. Percy could have sworn he saw That smirk.

“Well I think That clearly takes after his uncle. Maybe we should call him Vax’ildan?” he suggested, half jokingly, half serious. It was pretty standard fare in the De Rolo family to name children for dead relatives, there had been two other Percival De Rolos before him, after all. But he’d not yet really raised the idea with Vex. He’d certainly considered it with his own family, though the idea of having to pick between Julius, Oliver and Ludwig was not one he wanted to entertain. And having a child called Julius Oliver Ludwig Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo II, was perhaps a little too much ammunition for Reasons to Despise Your Parents. Vax’ildan Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo, on the other hand, now that would be a simpler name. It sort of suited him as well, a little smattering of dark black hair already growing on his head, and tiny pointed tips to his tiny ears. Everything about his sons was impossibly small and it was, without a doubt, the cutest thing about them.

“No.” said Vex at last, her eyes fixed onto their son in deep thought. Her voice sounded slightly hollow, and Percy immediately regretted his suggestion at all! She must have seen the horror on his face because she immediately clasped his hand in hers and bought it up for a kiss.

“It was a beautiful thought Darling, it really was, but well... I don’t want it to look as though I’m replacing my twin with my son. We were a matching set, equals and allies and, well that’s not the relationship I want with our children. And I don’t want to take anything away from what he could have with his own brother by putting that on him. It’s a lot to live up to in a name and I would hate to think we had higher expectations on him than on his brother simply because of that, do you understand?”

“Of course I do.” Percy replied, kissing her hand. “Correct as always, it was only a suggestion. So, I guess that clears a lot of names off of the table if we’re not going for anyone who’s already de--”

“-- I was thinking maybe Tiberius,” she said in a rush, catching her breath at the end. Percy thought for a moment as he tried to take it in. “He just, he never got to see Whitestone in the end” she explained quickly “and, well we were with him for so long and he so wanted to be here but there were problems and, and he deserves to be remembered here too. With a name in the books that’ll last.”

“But I thought you just said--”

“-- I know, I know! But it’s not the same with Tiberius. He was our brother but not, not in the same way as Vax was.”

“Tiberius Von Musel Klossowsi de Rolo.” mused Percy, rolling the name around in his tongue as he looked down at his sons, “Yes I think that will work nicely.”

“You, you do?” Vex replied, sounding a little stunned “I thought that maybe you’d--”

“You’re right. He deserves to be a part of Whitestone, and I can think of no more appropriate a way than this. I only wish I’d have thought of it myself.” he admitted, a sudden feeling of guilt welling up inside him that he hadn’t even considered Tiberius before Vex had suggested it. “So what do we name his brother, then?”

“What about, Percival Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowsi de Rolo IV?”

“No.” he answered flatly. “We are certainly not allowing that kind of confused nonsense in this household thank you very much. One Percival is enough, if I do say so myself.”

“Quite right Darling,” sighed Vex “I don’t know, you choose. I picked Tiberius, it’s only fair you pick next.”

Percival thought carefully. If they were naming one child after an ally, it only made sense that they do the same for the other. Vex’ahlia was correct, it wouldn’t be fair for one of them to have a legacy and the other not to. If they were going to mess up their children this early on, they might as well be fair about it. He thought carefully about who they had met on their travels who would be a good enough role model for their children. Someone who would be steadfast and true without overbearing. It had to be something that would compliment the qualities Tiberius bought, without copying them.

“I know,” he smiled at last “we name him after the one who finally brought an end to the Chroma Conclave.”

“You want to call him Vox Machina?” said Vex in surprise, looking between him and the crib and clearly wondering if he’d gone mad. He laughed and held her closer, pressing a kiss to her head

“No Dear, even by our standards that would be ridiculous. You really _do_ need to get some sleep don’t you? No, Kerrek. The one who landed the killing blow on Raishan? I do hope you remember him at least.”

“Of course I remember him!” huffed Vex, “Just excuse me if I think of the destruction of the conclave as a bit more of a team effort.”

“Comprised solely of us?”

“And our allies! Anyway, Vox Machina isn’t that much more ridiculous than Percival Fredrickstein.”

 

“Oh, so you wanted him to be first name Vox, second name Machina? Oh _now _I see where you’re coming from.” said Percy with a wave of sarcastic understanding__

“Oh shut up, I’m tired. You know what I meant.” she sighed, leaning her head against his shoulder and he felt the truth of it. No matter how much fatherhood was taking out of him, it paled in comparison to what she was doing as a mother. He’d really have to step up his game once they were on solids.

 _“_ So Kerrek and Tiberius.” mused Vex, looking down at her sons. “Who’s going to be who?”

“Well This always seems to be the one encouraging That when it comes to puking down my top. That’s similar to encouraging violence?”

“And That always has that amazing ‘is any of this actually really happening?’ face when Tary does his ‘baby talk’? That’s very Kerrek.”

“Yes, I can see it, yeah. I like that.” he grinned, beamed down at her “Hey look at that, we’re officially proper parents now.”

“Yeah, we are.” she agreed before pausing with horror “Oh no, we’re not going to have to come up with middle names as well?”

Percy laughed again, “I’m afraid I am going to have to insist on middle names too. No, don’t give me that look, there’s a lot of power in a middle name. You’ll thank me later when they start taking after their parents and getting into all sorts of trouble. Nothing brings out fear in a child like the use of a middle name.”

“Fine.” she yawned “Come on, let’s try and get some sleep whilst they’re still out of--”

As if on queue the newly named Tiberius opened his eyes, blinked up at her, and started to cry out for his feed. He immediately woke up Kerrek and he too joined in with the wail.

Vex let out a groan and slammed her head against Percy’s shoulder. “Just once, can they not just co-operate with us one time?”

“I know love, I know.” he soothed, patting her gently “but I promise I’ll clean it all up when it comes out the other end in an hour.”

“Good.” she mumbled, pulling down her shirt once more and heading over to their armchair.

Percy carefully picked up Tiberius and placed him into her arms where he greedily latched onto her. “For the record, Dear, you are absolutely amazing at this.”

“I know,” she sighed, signalling for him to bring over Kerrek as well, “but it’s nice to hear it from you.”

“I love you.” she smiled, running a hand through her hair.

She leant back into the touch, “I know.”

“Is it okay if I go take a nap for a bit?”

“You do that and I’ll have Trinket kill you in your sleep.” she muttered darkly

“You wouldn’t do it yourself? I don’t know whether to be touched or insulted.” he replied with a trademark grin.

“I think what you actually mean is ‘I’m sorry.’” There was a fire in her words that not even six years of marriage had granted resistance to.

“I’m sorry.” he answered appropriately, “I promise to make it up to you.” He kneeled next to her and simply basked in the glow of his new family. For so long he didn’t think he’d ever get to have this. It was hard to think of anything so blissful when he was still clinging to life by his bloodied fingertips, mourning the loss of his parents and siblings. Yet here he was, in a reclaimed Whitestone, a lord again, an instigator of peace, a friend, a husband, a brother and a father. Life was good. Better than good, amazing.

He was even looking forward to cleaning away crap from someone else’s arse. Funny how life could be like that sometimes.

**Author's Note:**

> Final Names:
> 
> Kerrek Arthur Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo
> 
> Tiberius Thomas Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo
> 
> Vex suggested Tiberius’ middle name be “Larkin”, since it was only right to honour her brother in some small way, but Percy put his foot down.
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoyed this? Let me know via Kudos/Comments or on Tumblr where I'm Mrsmarymorstan


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